Published: LifeLines for Health, vol. 8 (Fall 2016)

by Lisa Cosseboom, M.Ed. & C.A.G.S School Psychologist & Special Education Evaluation Team Chairperson

For parents, the process of going into the school for a meeting produces anxiety, if not some level of fear. So often, it is one or two parents entering a room, quite often filled with multiple educators, including teachers, special educators, nurses, specialists, counselors etc. The process can be daunting and intimidating. Acronyms like IEP, LRE, FAPE are thrown around and parents frequently don’t know what those acronyms mean. As an Evaluation Team Chair, I see parents’ frustration, or even worse them disconnect from the meeting process altogether. This often produces tension amongst the Team members and parents feel that they need to come to a meeting with their defenses up and ready to battle! Complicating matters is that often a school team is uninformed about the bleeding disorder community and the impact a bleeding disorder has on a child’s education.

When parents come to a meeting with an initial sense of anger or frustration, the emotional outcome of the meeting is not going to be productive or what is in the best interest of the child and is most likely to fracture the entire team process. As the person who facilitates the IEP meeting, I generally can sense the direction the meeting is going to go when I introduce myself to the parents to bring them into the meeting room. Disposition and attitude of the parents are generally evident upon this first greeting as is the attitude and disposition of the school team. It is extremely important that the school based team and the family work together in the education process to strengthen the partnership between home and school. Research demonstrates that children perform better in school when parents are more informed and involved in their education process. Additionally, this involvement fosters relationships with the teachers, nurses and specialists that help keep them informed of your child’s current medical/emotional needs!

Some things for parents to keep in mind when approaching a 504 or IEP Team meeting:

1. Approaching a meeting making demands will not be productive, even if the demands are legitimate or reasonable. It is important to model the behavior that you want drawn out in your child’s plan.

2. It is important to recognize that having the mentality of you vs. them is not useful. The Team approach should be a “we” approach. The parents are part of the Team!

3. When parents are asked about their thoughts or concerns, it is just as important to comment on the positive as well as the concerns. Positive comments go a long way to help facilitate a positive atmosphere!

4. Always keep in mind that the Team is there to focus on the child, not any one person’s agenda.

5. It is important for parents to be knowledgeable in the process. If you are unsure of the regulations
of an IEP or 504 meeting, don’t be afraid to reach out to your school for clarification.

6. Provide information about your child’s bleeding disorder to the school-based team ahead of time so that they may make the time to read and research!

School Teams are invested in the process and want things to be positive and work together collaboratively with families. It is vital that all parties come to the table with the child and the child’s needs in mind in relationship to school functioning and success. Most educators go into the education field because of their love of children and their love of watching children grow and succeed. They work hard, long hours, for little pay and just want to make a difference for children and families. Approaching meetings positively will almost always yield positive results!